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Post by Jett Tsar on Nov 27, 2009 23:21:30 GMT -5
Jett raked a hand through his hair, feeling a sudden and unexpected bout of exhaustion take over him. He longed for a solid object to stable himself with, but because there were none around he settled with spreading his legs further so that he would not have to rely to much on balance.
"I am not ashamed, Manisha." Jett told her quietly, his eyes growing soft. A memory flashed, paining him, which he showed through a short grimace. "That scream..." he wondered if she had heard it. It was likely she wouldn't have cared. It puzzled him to see a woman who seemed to be ruled by duty rather than emotion.
"I'm sorry." And he meant it, but it was not only for his behavior. It was in regards to her upbringing. What monsters could force a young woman to be as lifeless as she was. She may have had beauty and loyalty and skill, but her personality was as deep as a brook and her sensitivity--what made her human--was as black as a void. Yet Jett did not loathe her. He pitied her.
"I will go." But he would not stay away. He turned towards his cell block and walked with slow steps, keeping his eyes on the fire and the ashes of the woman.
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Post by Manisha on Nov 27, 2009 23:55:22 GMT -5
She felt strange. As though things seemed a little less bright now. She'd felt like this once before. What had her mother called it? Guilt? Was that it? Or was it sadness? She did not understand. Perhaps he could but she didn't. She kept her mask up while she pondered this and for once she was the one left trying to catch up as she strode over to where he was. She was going against all of her training but something had struck her when he'd apologized. That was what had triggered this feeling she was sure. For once she didn't push it aside. Manisha meant to learn to understand these emotions and for that it would behoove her to experience them instead of laying them aside.
She searched her brain for something to say but she wasn't sure what she could say to him. It suddenly felt like she was back during her first day of training. She'd asked her instructor whether she'd get to see her mommy and daddy again. He'd said no. That had made her feel this same way but much much worse. So this was sadness?
"Uh..." Manisha grabbed for anything she could say, "I'll escort you to your cell!"
Even he would notice the stumble over the tongue on her part and the forced words. Manisha didn't like feeling like this, awkward and unskilled. It was why she'd generally just left the men in her unit alone when they wanted to do something social. She just didn't have the skills for such interaction.
"I heard the woman's scream. I've always hated those screams. They mean failure on my part and that's something I don't like." |
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Post by Jett Tsar on Nov 28, 2009 19:49:57 GMT -5
Jett's surprise and pleasure sparked as he heard Manisha following. The tips of his fingers tingled as she drew closer, and curiosity willed him to turn his head to see her face. His large eyes scrutinized her as she spoke.
I'll escort you to your cell.
Well that was unexpected. Here Jett had thought he'd seen the last of her for the night, and suddenly she was offering her services. It was unnecessary, really; he was a man, he could walk home alone. But he couldn't deny that her presence would be appreciated, and though he'd never admit it, she did give him a sense of security.
A short nod expressed his approval.
As Manisha stumbled to make small talk Jett felt a warm wave of air pass over him. He realized his face was flushed, but this time it was not for him but for her. He watched the girl from the corner of his eyes, ready to glance away if she made any sign of looking towards him.
Her sudden change of heart was surprising but not unexpected. Not everything said seemingly innocently was. Jett could be just as manipulative as the next person. In this case, however, he hadn't actually expected it to work. A bubble of joy and hope tightened his chest, making his breathing quicken.
"Nobody likes failure." He said, not in a patronizing manner but in a tone that implied he agreed. Turning his head to the sky, he gazed as he recounted, "I've heard women scream countless times. For all different reasons. But none like that." His eyes grew dark and brooding as they slid their way down to Manisha's face. "None like that."
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Post by Manisha on Nov 28, 2009 20:32:32 GMT -5
"I've heard screams like that many times before. It's rare that I've heard a scream that wasn't of that sort. Men, Women, Children: I've heard all of them scream like that. Sometimes I was the one causing it. Other times I was the purported rescuer watching and hearing the result of my failure"
If you listened closely you might hear some of the repressed anger and sorrow in that statement. Manisha had no skill in manipulation. Chances were unless he told her that Manisha would never realize she'd been manipulated into following him. In her mind she was seeking to understand what all these emotions were about and he was a source for this. In some very tangible ways the battle hardened warrior woman was incredibly naive and inexperienced.
What was one supposed to talk about during casual conversation? Manisha was unaware what was considered proper conversation material so she lapsed into silence. It was probably better that she not say anything rather than try to cobble together some lame attempt. Some would call that another of her failings. If felt she at all unsure about something it was highly unlikely that she would take the risk of doing it. Therefore after her initial response to him she remained silent. The only sound filling the air being the waning crackle of the fire. By the time she finished escorting him to his cell the time would be ripe to go and bury the woman. It was then that she recalled his offer to go to the orchards. Perhaps she could take him up on it for another time?
"The orchards. We could go tomorrow perhaps?" |
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Post by Jett Tsar on Nov 28, 2009 23:28:23 GMT -5
Jett nodded numbly, unsure how to feel about what she told him. He did not pass judgment on others. How could he, being one who did not always make the best of choices himself? He'd displeased many people in his childhood, flaws he felt he was still making up for today and would be for time to come. He could not fathom what she told him, therefore his ideas of her did not change in his mind. If he had understood the weight of what she did and had done, he would undoubtedly turn his back on the woman. His ignorance preserved her.
He opened his mouth to tell her that she had yet to fail him and until that point he would refuse to believe someone as diligent and seemingly flawless as her could, but she spoke before he had the opportunity.
The breath caught in Jett's throat. She was throwing punches of surprise his way left and right. Going to bed a seemed a good idea now. He could recuperate from her.
"Of course." he said quickly, before she would have time to change her mind. "I will meet you there at noon." He tried to swallow the smile, but it wormed its way to his lips. Not wanting to break any strings within the fragile situation, he bowed courteously and turned to the door of his cell block, entering briskly and shutting the door behind him.
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